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BUILDING STRONG FAMILIES

2/8/2025

Breaking the Cycle: Healing from the Past to Support Your Child’s Growth and Resilience

Children's Network of Solano County

You Are a Good Parent

As a caregiver, prioritizing your child's well-being is paramount. Optimal care begins with ensuring your own well-being. It's essential to be in a good place yourself, have strategies to support your mental health, and have backup plans for difficult days.

Health care providers are discovering strategies and tools that not only support children but also caregivers. It’s important to take the time to prioritize your emotional health to better care for your family.

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Cultivating Strength and Resilience

 

The impact of past and present relationships is significant for everyone. Strength and resilience can be cultivated through effective strategies, even in the face of adversity.

What does it take to embody strength and resilience? It includes:

  • Knowing how to manage stress: Use tools to help you cope with daily stress.

  • Stepping away from emotions: Learn how to distance yourself from overwhelming emotions when things get hard.

  • Bouncing back from difficult experiences: Understand that it’s okay to have setbacks and help your children do the same.

Research indicates that nurturing relationships and positive parenting practices foster resilience and strength in both adults and children.

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Understanding and Overcoming the Impact of a Difficult Childhood

Many adults have experienced challenging childhoods, such as abuse, violence, or substance abuse, which deeply affect their health, relationships, and parenting styles. These experiences can lead to difficulties, but it’s essential to recognize that past adversity does not define your future. With support and resilience, you can build a positive path forward.

The Adverse Effects of Difficult Childhood

Approximately 1 in 4 adults have faced adverse childhood environments, including:

  • Direct personal harm inflicted by others

  • Witnessing violence against a parent or caregiver

  • Exposure to substance abuse within the household

These experiences, whether experienced directly or witnessed, can profoundly impact one’s health, relationships, and approach to parenting. It's important to recognize that no one deserves to endure such circumstances.

Health Effects of Difficult Childhood Experiences

Difficult childhood experiences increase the risk of various challenges for both you and your children, such as:

  • Perpetuating negative cycles: Behavioral and relational patterns that are hard to break.

  • Health issues: Including asthma, chronic pain, and obesity.

  • Harmful behaviors: Like smoking, excessive drinking, or substance abuse.

  • Mental health struggles: Such as anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts.

  • Harmful dynamics within adult relationships.

However, adversity doesn’t determine your future. You have the ability to find resilience, prioritize health, and create a better path forward.

Walk in the Park

Healing and Moving Forward

 

While the effects of a difficult childhood can be challenging, they do not define your ability to be a strong, supportive parent. Healing is a journey that requires self-compassion and resilience.

  • Acknowledge your past: Recognize the impact of past experiences but don’t let them control your future.

  • Focus on your healing: Take steps toward emotional well-being, such as seeking therapy or joining support groups.

  • Be patient with yourself: It takes time to overcome challenges, but each step toward healing is progress.

Resources and Support

 

There are many resources available to help you on your journey of healing and resilience. Below, you’ll find key resources along with links to access them in both English and Spanish:

For additional resources, visit www.futureswithoutviolence.org.

Get Help

 

If you or your children are in immediate danger, or you need support, here are some important contacts:

  • Emergency Assistance: Call 911 for immediate police assistance.

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1-800-799-7233 or visit www.thehotline.org for confidential support, crisis intervention, and referrals.

  • Report Child Abuse in Solano County: Call 1-800-544-8696 to report instances of child abuse or if you or your children are in danger within Solano County.

  • Local Domestic Violence Services: Safequest Solano, Inc. – 24/7 crisis line at 1-866-487-7233. For appointments, call 1-707-422-7345.

  • Family Resource Center Support: Contact your local Family Resource Center for additional information and support.

Conclusion

 

The path to healing and resilience is a journey, but it’s one that can lead to a brighter future for both you and your children. By focusing on self-care, seeking support, and taking proactive steps, you can break the cycle of adversity and create a nurturing, positive environment for your family. You are doing your best, and that is enough.

Content adapted from "Connected Parents, Connected Kids" by Futures Without Violence (www.futureswithoutviolence.org).

Concerned About a Child’s Safety?

Report suspected abuse or neglect in Solano County: Call 1-800-544-8696 or contact local child welfare services or police. If a child is in immediate danger, call 911.

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